Dysthymia Club

by I'm Alone

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04:12
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01:45

about

Here's to a reprieve from the unabridged Hell that was 2015.

Featured on Waiting For June's "Bandcamp Finds: Trip-Hop": blog.kurage.me/2016/01/bandcamp-finds-trip-hop.html

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released January 1, 2016

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I'm Alone Houston, Texas

Experimental electronic music for bats, for the inconsolable, for the dead, for the addicted, for the too hopeless or too hopeful, for the people that see therapists, for the limerent; sounds for the anxious, the grieving, the lucid dreamers, the starving artists, the people that can't get it together, for anyone that's ever felt alone in a room full of people. ... more

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Track Name: Brittle
Slip me some air

And I can not speak
Because I never breathe
Your shadow it stalks
Where I never sleep
Oh, you're underground
While I'm making sounds
And I'm still alive
And nothing feels right

Slip me some air
Track Name: It'll Be A Blessing
My withered bones in your bed
My body, it's eating itself
You're humming to the nothingness
Our friends are waving, our friends are dead
My withered bones in your bed
The brakes are screeching, it's nothing yet

The trains are showing in my left arm
We've long sleeve t-shirts, so no alarm
The vein collapses, I have some more
The overdoses - well, this is war
I'll sell my keyboard, I'll sell my soul
I'll sell whatever, live in this hole

And we'll stay happy or we'll stay numb
Live in the ashes of what we've done
Because life's a blessing, because life's a curse
And we're surviving through all the worst
Track Name: Loop Start Signaling
You make my heart spin left and right
There's something in me I don't like
You set the rain beneath the lights
There's something in me I don't like

I like the way you move me
The way you make me care
I like the way you soothe me
The way you make me care
Track Name: Antidepressants Interlude
You make my heart spin so soft
When I'm with you I feel lost
Nothing else exists with you
Tint my whole world lovely blue
We don't need shelter from rain
We get tired of what's plain
So we choose to learn ourselves
Just what happens without health

Stared down handguns, closed our eyes
Found out what it means to die
Drank too much and withered down
Tired of the safe and sound

Anechoic chamber head
Break the mold or you'll be dead
Call her heartfelt, sweet pet names
Know it always ends the same
Quit what kills you, find your words
Lest you lose out on self worth
Hold her close and brew some tea
Find some more emergencies

Everything I love today
Never finds my heart this way
Everything I miss today
Found that out and went away

All I know is I like you
Track Name: Beautiful Plume
The morning sleeps in my head
Sometimes I wish I were dead
The weight of this .45
At least it talks when I try
The cluster headaches and I
Find terms on the kitchen tiles
If I look happy then why
Why do I cut myself

Your blessings glow like a plant
I miss the point of feedback
The bottle fuzzes my eyes
At least it talks when I try
The way we screamed at the moon
Laid blame on the satellites
We know the space between lights
The gravity on balloons

My thoughts explode in my head
Most nights I wish I were dead
This endless lump in my throat
Makes all my love seem cold
And should I choose the right words
To make my face seem less blurred
Or make your feelings less hurt
Why do I cut myself

My thoughts explode in my head
Most nights I wish I were dead
The weight of this .45
And if I'll suicide

Your love explodes in my head
Most days I'm stuck in my bed
Your love breaks walls in my life
Most nights you're in my mind
Track Name: Spin Me Soft
In between the storm and I
There's not much I can't survive
In between my veins and eyes
There's a lot I want to hide
Elevators in my arms
Lose their lives in my self-harm
Wither up and help me die
Keep me broke but keep me high

The ocean sings, it means nothing
Hey, you, what's wrong? I don't belong
And what may grow in May
Will with winter wither away

It's the only gravity
That I feel can do healing
What we keep inside our heads
Everything we take to bed
Makes it easy to forget
Just how quickly we meet death
Stuck inside without self-care
Try to comfort what's not fair

The ocean sings, it means nothing
Hey, you, what's wrong? I don't belong
And what may grow in May
Will with winter wither away